A Little Perspective

Now that March Madness has come to an end, it’s officially recital/evaluation season. Our EAC recital is tomorrow evening. With that comes inevitable worry wart nerves and the polar opposite: brazen confidence/arrogance where a person feels above disciplined preparation.

I found myself saying pretty much the same thing personalized for each student last week. Let me digress a bit…

A few weeks ago our 15 year old dog’s disease progressed to the point where it was inevitable that we let him go to his rest. I really didn’t know how I was going to be there for this beautiful loyal member of our family. But the night before, I remembered how at age 8, I had been there in the garage when the vet put our boxer to sleep.

This has always rankled with me. I never understood why my Dad thought it was a good idea. Maybe I wanted to and I don’t remember. But all these years later, I understood that if I could do it at age nine I could be there for Jack now. And I was.

OK.  Back to the question of worry wart nerves…

I told my students not to borrow trouble (my Mom’s favorite phrase). I said that they obviously loved, insert piece here, and that they should rely on the good work they had done and be the person they are right now in the Spring of 2015 not someone they hoped to be in the future.

The future, after all, is abstract, and not predictable at all. If a situation happened they would deal with it—they had in fact already done so many times in lessons and studio class. There was no point in fantasizing about various calamities or trying to be someone they are not.

They all ride bikes or drive. We talked about how when you do either of those things you rely on your ability and don’t second guess yourself all the way down the street. You just do it. Yes, you are alert as you go along but not paralyzed by visions of calamities.

Mistakes in driving or biking can result in injury or even death. I asked them what was the worst that would result from a mishap in their performance? A little discomfort? A wrong note or 3? Embarrassment? Bottom line is absolutely nobody goes to the hospital or dies.

When I was learning to drive and merge into traffic on the highway, I remember my Dad telling me 9 times out of 10 there will be a spot and the 10th time everything will work out somehow. I use this wisdom often in many aspects of my life to keep my perspective.

Of course, if a person is arrogant and been above practicing all semester, then none of the above perspective will help because you simply can’t rely on what you didn’t do. Fortunately, I don’t know anyone like that. So, tomorrow night, everyone can take comfort in the good work they have done, and celebrate the wonderful musicians they are right now as they perform.

Just one more thing… Audience members come to enjoy a wonderful hour or so of beautiful music played by their favorite people. No one in any audience is ever going to be sitting there counting wrong notes and slips. And, if they are, well, we are not their friends.