Whew! All the end of term and holiday recital craziness is past us.

Years ago I read a group of entertaining rules of performance etiquette in the style of Jolly Olde England. I have no idea what the original source was at this point. (Someone once told me that after 5 years of using an idea it’s yours) If you are the author of the original, many thanks and I would be glad to give you the credit you deserve.

Over the years my students have added in some rules of their own. And, here they are!

Ye Olde Rules of Performance Etiquette

 

I. Ye fingere nails shall be cleansed ere being seated at thine instrument.

 

II. Ye royal guests shall not makest funkzy faces at ye piano players whilst they be playing, thusly to cause them to mess up.

 

III. Ye performers must not choose to chewn ye bubbly gums fore it is unsightly.

 

IV. Ye smalle childrens must not fidget nor maketh loude noises whilst listening, ere ye shall suffer ye royal performers wrath.

 

V. Thou shalt practice daily else thou shalt practice for ye olde audience.

 

VI. There is no rule VI.

 

VII.Ye olde performers must not wipe their greasy fingers nor leane their elbows nor rest their legges on ye olde piano lest they disgust their audience companions.

 

VIII. Neither shall ye olde teacher make funkzy faces nor even speak words of encouragement whilst ye students are performing.

 

IX. Ye gluttons must not hog ye old piano nor play Bach for more hours than be appropriate.

 

X. Ye royal audience must avoid quarreling, bragging, or boasting of ye olde offspring’s vast talents with ye other guests.

 

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